My then girlfriend was given the name Nyawozenkawu, due to her abnormally long feet. Apparently she was already a shoe size 10 when she turned 12 years old. One of my other friend's bae was called uSiyabhuyabhu. She was epileptic and was obese.

I must be honest though, our weddings are more spectacular. In our weddings, there is a lot of meat. Lots of singing and dancing. People get showered with booze until they swim in it. Ours is a three-day event, taking place for the entire weekend.

It has been four months since you were laid to rest, but I still think about the day I received the news of your death. Do you know how I knew it was bad news even before I answered my phone? It is because it was Khongozi's number flashing on my screen.

"Molo bass"; was the salutation they did as they lined up, one at a time until all of them had passed. Some mornings, when bass was not in the mood for individual greetings, he'd command them to say it together, in unison. "Molo bass"; and make them run to the field and start work.

If your head is weaved with pubic hair taken off some old Indian woman and you wear plastic nails, hands off Mshoza, you hypocrite! The other day I found myself searching for the meaning of the word natural